Wednesday, May 9

Calls to Take This Blog Down

Over the course of my writings on this blog, I have recieved calls from people to remove it from the net. Reasons have ranged from people thinking that I shouldn't be airing my dirty laundry to some people feeling that I am saying somehow the Laestadian following is accepting of a gay lifestyle by me being open about it.

I want to make one thing very clear here. I am not in any way insinuating that the Laestadian faith is affirming or accepting of homosexuality. It is very clearly not. Thus my experience. I have grown up in an environment that I, myself, could not understand my own person, let alone any other person understanding what I am going through. I don't expect anyone to because it has been hard enough for me do deal with.

The reason I started this blog in the first place was to start putting out there, for all to see, what my mind is dealing with. In doing that, I was hoping to reach out to others in a similar situation or place in life to compare notes, struggles, joys, etc. I have nothing to hide and so I figured that while these conversations were to be had, they could also be out there for the world to see and comment on. I don't feel that I am harming anyone by doing this. It can only be a good thing. The links I have on my blog are there as resources for people to consider in their understanding of the context of the conversation that is happening. They are not there to promote any individual or organization.

Lastly, I have been forced to consider a lot about life, and ultimately the lack thereof with my cancer diagnosis. It is my sincerest hope that people remain respectful with any conversation that happens on this blog currently and well into my passing.


Blogger Creg said...

Here is a clip I have found interesting:

10:35 PM  
Blogger TruthSeeker said...

Please don't remove your blog.

You have my support.

Whose "dirty laundry" is it anyway? Not yours. Do not be ashamed, my friend. The God that breathed the world into existence doesn't ever say "oops". You are beautiful in your honesty. You are loved EXACTLY as you are.

6:49 AM  
Blogger rebounder said...

You are doing the right thing with this blog. You are standing on the bedrock of your own experiences growing up gay and laestadian. No one can diminish those experiences. They are yours. And it is good to bring them to the light. People find it easier to ignore troubling voices like yours, than to listen. You are making it harder to be ignored, and proving your own reality. Markus, you have gone thru and are still going thru many struggles. You are brave and strong. Keep going, you have much support!

10:40 AM  
Blogger she curves mobius said...


i have been following this blog for a long time now, even though i do not know you. i have wanted to write for ages, but could never find the words. it warmed my heart when i saw you writing from the perspective of an LLC'er who is also gay. i do not know the backstory, nor if you are believing now, but i want to thank you for your bravery and openness. this is a subject i so desperately wanted brought up at youth discussions, confirmation, any gathering, for i have battled it all my life. it always seemed to be so taboo, and as someone pointed out, people find it easier to ignore issues they are uncomfortable with. its much easier to only focus on issues like music, movies and proper clothing at discussions. they say that the Bible states homosexuality as sin, that it's wrong, end of story. it is not that simple, nor is it that clear. the whole verse is not read nor understood. but i won't get into that here.

as a young kid i knew i was attracted to the same sex, and put myself through every negative emotion possible. i ripped myself apart because there was no one to talk to, no one that i thought was going through the same thing. i thought i was the most awful and terrible person on earth. i only wish i could have found a blog like yours then! to think that people have had the gall to contact you and tell you to take it down is ludicrous. if they don't like it, they should stop reading it and let it be. please, do not take this down.

i have left the LLC church and have been seeking other spiritual guidance and journies. things just dont fit in my old church. i have honestly never been happier.

i want to wish you all the best markus, and i'd love to corresond with you more. i hope you beat this illness you are going through, and know you are in all my thoughts and prayers.


4:55 PM  
Blogger my views said...

i just have one question. as a former laestadian myself who is also gay, i have been kind of confused about some of the things you have said in the past. i havent been on here in months, but for some reason i just remembered a topic of discussion a while back. you said that while you are gay, you dont act on it and dont live the lifestyle. WHY NOT? since you, like me, believe that being gay is not a sin, simply the way you were born (such as being born white or black or mexican for example), why would it then be a sin to act upon it? do you want to be lonely for the rest of your life? are you saying that you will never have any kind of meaningful relationship in your life because you dont want to act on it? if so, i feel sorry for you and encourage you to be yourself, and pursue happiness. happiness will not come by trying to convince narrow-minded brainwashed laestadians. you need to let go of your past and live your life the way you want. try dating, meeting people. pray that god will sooner or later help you find the right guy for you to settle down with.

--im not trying for this to be offensive, im just trying to reason how, if you are gay, why is it wrong to act on it? you say you dont. i think it is time that you do. otherwise you will never be happy. imagine if you had that significant other in your troubles with your health right now

1:42 AM  

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